Q’s (lines)

Lines in this country are more similar to a mob. It’s never really a line of people, but a cluster at the counter pushing forward into the counter. I learned at the phone office to wedge my way to the window and stick my arm in the hole in the window before anyone else could. Your arm in the hole makes you the next person in line. And in most places, if you don’t cut in line with force, you’ll never make it to the front. You have to learn to be aggressive. I’ve caught myself on vacation in other places a few times cutting in line, forgetting that this country is not like the rest of the world.

As a woman I have an advantage. Because women are less common in public, women and senior citizens have their own line at the electricity bill office (if the employee for that line shows up), and at the phone bill office it’s “One women after every four men,” which means I get to count to the 4^th man from the front and wedge my way in the line there, hoping they will abide by the signs. Just because the signs are there doesn’t mean you’re not pushing your way into the line.

I am now way more appreciative of the organized lines in America!

Gold

Gold is so much more than a precious metal. It is a significant status symbol coveted by this country and flaunted whenever possible. You will not find gold less than 18 carats in this country, but only 18 carats or more! (If you’re a lover of silver jewelry, you won’t find any here!) Since they don’t add many other metals to their gold, to the American eye it looks like fake jewelry. It’s a bright gold color instead of the duller gold color we’re used to. But it’s the real thing.

Weddings are probably the biggest event one’s gold is displayed for all to see. The groom’s family presents the bride with gold earrings, a necklace, and bangles. The earrings and necklace are by American standards too big and gaudy, but the price tag is usually not under $2000, and sometimes way over that! Women attending the wedding sometimes wear the set they received for their marriage, and if not they wear another set they acquired. Anytime I wear gold, fake or real, someone notices, and asks me if it is real gold.

Thank You

I never realized how much we use the words “Thank You” in the states until I moved here. I have offended a few of my friends several times because I told them “thank you” for something. If you are friends in this culture, you never say thank you. It is assumed the other person is grateful because you are friends already! It makes sense, but it’s still so hard not to say “thank you!”

Unhappy? Protest!

Protests and strikes are so common that they appear daily in the local newspaper in at least two or three articles. It's also common to see groups chanting and marching down the middle of the roads in town, blocking the already traffic jammed roads. Common issues for protests or strikes:

• Rise in prices of essential commodities
• Political issues such as the Indo-US nuclear deal
• Water-logging in the city during monsoon season
• Killing/poaching of one-horned rhinos found in our state
• Demanding sealing of Indo-Bangladesh border and an inner line permit for the state
• Child trafficking
• The state to become a country independent of india
• Train employees receiving insufficient pay

Salwars, Mekhelasadors, and Lungis: What are they?

One of the things I like most about this country is the clothes they wear.
Women
The most important rule of clothing for the women is to cover your legs completely, and to cover the chest with 2 layers of clothing. It doesn't matter if the stomach shows. Women in our area usually wear one of 3 things: a sari , a salwar kameez, or a mekhelasador.
Sari: a long piece of cloth (about 9 yards) wrapped around the legs, chest, and then drapes off the left shoulder. Under the sari women wear a petticoat (a long cloth skirt) and tuck the folds of the sari in it so the sari doesn't fall. They also wear a blouse underneath, which is a tightfitting top covering the chest.
Salwar Kameez: If you've seen any of my pictures, this is what I'm usually wearing. The pants are the salwar, the kameez is the shirt, and the churney is the part that drapes over my chest and hangs over my shoulders. The pants are very baggy and have a drawstring, so they never fit your waist, but hang off like pajama pants that are several sizes too big. The shirts usually go down to or past our knees, and the bottom part is useful in the kitchen as a kitchen towel and table rag. The churney is always getting in the way but can come in handy to breath through when going through sooty and smokey traffic.
Mekhelasador: This is traditional dress of the state we live in. Similar to a sari, but two pieces. One piece is the skirt, and they top piece tucks into the skirt and wraps around the chest like a sari. The bottom piece is called the mekhela, and the top piece is called the sador. Traditional sadors have small tassel-type things on the ends for decoration and have a specific gold and red design (see the picture on the top right of my blog!)
Men
Western: Men wearing western clothes almost always have on slacks and a collared, button up shirt, even if they're wearing a lungi. Grown men tend not to wear shorts or t-shirts; they see those items as kid clothes. Some men wear t-shirts, but usually for style.
Lungi: A lot of men still wear lungi, usually a plaid-designed piece of cloth they wrap around their waist like a skirt, lengths varying from mid-calf to really short!

Traffic Rules: There Are None!

Granted, I've never driven a car here, but riding a bike is hard enough. Things you have to dodge:
- cows, goats, dogs, ducks
- men carrying/selling vegetables and other items
- cars
- rickshaws
- autorickshaws
- men pulling 2-wheeled push carts
- horses pulling 2-wheeled push carts
- pedestrians (sidewalks are horrible, if there are any)
- carrier trucks
- buses
- bike riders
- elephants (only occasionally)
- protesting groups marching down the middle of the street
- construction workers

In our city of 2 million people, there is one sole traffic light, and no stop signs. If we're lucky, at some 3-way points there might be a police-man directing traffic. If we need to make a turn (or cross the street), we're pretty much on our own to squeeze our way in whenever there is a 2-foot space between cars. Honking is very important here (or on a bicycle ringing the bell). If you are riding down the road and there is anything within 6 inches of the vehicle/bike, you must honk to let them know you are coming and to get out of the way. In other words, honking is a continuous ordeal here, not just when someone's driving is annoying you. There are no lines on the road, and it wouldn't matter if there are. They can easily make a 4-lane road an 8-lane road. So, every time I get on my bike, I say a little prayer - "Lord get me there alive!"

The Guest

Throughout this country, a guest is to be treated as if they were a god. As soon as the guest arrives the host insists they sit down. A guest is always expected to sit down. Even if the guest would prefer to stand, they will insist you sit. To have a hungry guest is utterly shameful. Any time you go to a house, you can expect hot tea and some kind of sweets, either biscuits (cookie) or local sweets bought from a local sweet shop (or if you're in the village it might have been handmade). Often they will present you with an entire plate full of sweets, just for you! If the host knows you are coming, and it is a first or second visit, they will almost always prepare full meal, no matter what time of the day it is, and no matter how hungry you are at the moment. They will serve you a mountain-size plate of rice, daal, and fried vegetables to make sure you are full. (The experience of eating at someone's house requires a separate post.) And even if they serve you a full meal, you will have tea before the meal and possibly after the meal. Hosts want to make you as comfortable as possible. During the summer, on particularly hot days, they might even fan you with their hand fans made out of bamboo. If the host needs to tend to something, like making the tea, they will often leave you sitting by yourself for a period of time until they return. When the host leaves the room they will tell you again to sit (even if you are already sitting) and then tell you they are coming (even though they are leaving the room). After you get to know someone well, you might be able to get away with turning down tea and just coming for a chat without all the formalities. When you are leaving a house, you always say you will come back and you will meet again (even if you know you won't). If you are the host, you must ask the person to come again. I'm sure I've left out several things, but this is a brief description of guest formalities.